Enjoy Becky's addition to the conversation we started in our Winter Spiritual Journal on the topic of "Relating and the New Earth".
I have always been able to see the Divine Human Soul underneath the demons that people carry. It is a beautiful way of relating with each other and it demands conscious boundaries.
Autumn was kindhearted and nonjudmental, a Helper. Looking back, I see her as a starseed soul who incarnated into a difficult bloodline to heal it up. A Healer, in fact. Back then, she was my just my friend. She was someone who had helped me without asking questions, and I enjoyed her playful energy.
When she stole from me, I felt the Betrayal deeply:
Anger- an appropriate response to boundary violations, fire in the body, compression.
Pain- the intrusion into the energy bodies, and the physical/energetic sensations of extraction, ripping, tearing.
Vulnerability- because of the violation, an openness like holes in a screen.
Bleeding- energetically and emotionally there was a seeping, weeping wound.
Compassion- warm and soft, because I knew the shame she carried at this action so counter to her True Nature. Sadness. Confusion.
Shame- my own for “allowing” it to happen, for ignoring the many red flags. Disappointment. My sense of safety in my home was shattered.
It was exactly 30 years ago: Fall 1992. I discovered the theft in mid-December. Likely, she was vulnerable and lonely over the Thanksgiving holiday, and I forgave her even as I said I would not live with her any longer. The apartment manager was somewhat sympathetic, but would not allow me to break my half of the lease, which I did not expect them to do. By this point, I’d been covering her financial shortfalls — very willingly and understandingly — so I asked her to either assume full financial responsibility for the lease or to allow me to do so and agree to leave.